The Blur in the Mirror

Conformity versus Non-Conformity

By Robert Ringer

As I said in Installment XXI, the good side of certitudes is that they give structure to civilizations. The bad side is that they promote conformity, which has a tendency to transform potentially vital human beings into the ranks of the walking dead. What are the effects of conformity versus non-conformity in our society and our schools?

By conformity, I am referring to the obsessive desire to do whatever it takes to be accepted by other members of one's tribe. Whether the tribe is an inner-city gang or a clique of golden-spoon students at a suburban high school, the cost of nonconformity is the unthinkable: expulsion.

Though we rarely speak about it, all of us have understood this rule from the time we first stepped into a schoolroom. It is safe to assume that The Game has been played by mankind throughout human history. And it is also safe to assume that this curse on the human psyche will always be with us.

Learning to conform in school is what sets the stage for conformity in adult life. For twelve or more years, we learn how to think like "mainstream" people. We learn how to be politically correct. We learn how not to make waves. And if we become really good at playing The Game, we look in the mirror and — the ultimate triumph of The Game — we see nothing but a blur.

Public schools in the USA were not intended to provide a good education but to provide good little workers for the industrial revolution with the minimum education needed to work the machines. This was the avowed purpose. Check the historical record yourself if you have trouble grasping this.

Since the schools were funded by the factories at the time, this sort of makes sense. However, the schools still pump out little replaceable cogs, worker bees, etc., not entrepreneurs. How many really successful people in the USA are there as a direct result of their public education? Or are they successful in spite of public education?

I feel that you should not be able to graduate high school until you know what is needed to start and run a business with a fair amount of detail (among other things). — Owen K.

Don't get me wrong. I don't mean to imply that everyone consciously plays The Game. On the contrary, many people sincerely believe they march to their own drummer. In The Art of Loving, Erich Fromm had a harsh message for such people:

Most people are not even aware of their need to conform. They live under the illusion that they follow their own ideas and inclinations, that they are individualists, that they have arrived at their opinions as a result of their own thinking — and that it just happens that their ideas are the same as those of the majority. The consensus of all serves as a proof for the correctness of "their" ideas. Since there is still a need to feel some individuality, such need is satisfied with regard to minor differences; the initials on the handbag or the sweater, the name plate of the bank teller, the belonging to the Democratic as against the Republican party, to the Elks instead of to the Shriners become the expression of individual differences. The advertising slogan of "it is different" shows up this pathetic need for difference, when in reality there is hardly any left.

Translation: With few exceptions, when it comes to expressing individuality, we are delusional. You see, without conforming, we would not be eligible to play The Game. We learn early on that it's cold on the outside, so, knowingly or unknowingly, we submit. Thus, the choice between conformity versus non-conformity is made — often without a great deal of thought.

At the end of the last installment, I said I would begin explaining the rules of The Game by starting with Early Me, and I intend to do so. But to fully appreciate what I have to say, I must first explain the hierarchical structure of the players in The Game.

In India, the inhumane caste system is slowly being dismantled, though there is no question it is still ingrained in the Indian psyche. India's "outcasts, or "untouchables," who today refer to themselves as "Dalits," have, through the help of other nations, made their plight visible to all.

But the caste system that is part and parcel of The Game in our schools is invisible. Why? Because most people simply close their eyes to it. It's pretty hard to see something when your eyes are closed. The caste system of The Game is not just alive and well, it is more firmly entrenched than ever.

In the next installment, I'll break down the caste system of The Game. The odds are pretty good that you will be able to relate to it through your own school experiences — and those of your children.

Previous - Part XXI, Intolerant Sheep: Bullying in School

Next - Part XXIII, Rings of the Caste System

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