Preparing the Playing Field

Playground Games

By Robert Ringer

As I said at the end of the last installment of The Cho Factor, the words from Janis Ian's 1970s song "At Seventeen" that have stuck with me over the years are: "And those whose names were never called when choosing sides for basketball."

The reason for this is that every day, on playgrounds all over the world, teachers still insist on having the kids in their PE classes choose up sides. Which means that one child - and only one child - is chosen last. And it's almost always the same one.

Actually, I take that back. The last child is not chosen. He (or she) is directed to be on whichever team did not have the next-to-last pick. Teachers who have described this to me say that when the child is told which team he will be on, the members of that team usually respond with such comments as, "Oh, no, not him!" Or, "Yuk! Why do we have to get stuck with him?" Or, simply, "We don't want him."

Can you even begin to comprehend the damage done to the psyche of a seven- or eight-year-old child who repeatedly experiences such humiliation and verbal abuse through these "playground games"? How can a child - who, at the same time, may be coping with learning and/or emotional issues - ever hope to recover from such ego-smashing devastation? I suspect that more than a few Chos, Klebolds, and Woodhams have graduated from their ranks.

Are the teachers who engage in such idiotic behavior simply stupid? Or sadistic? Or perhaps just too lazy to divide up the children as evenly as possible - without commenting on their abilities? Regardless of the reason, such cruelty should be brought to an immediate halt. And it should be made clear to all teachers that if they ever make such a mistake - even once - they will be dismissed immediately.

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When you wrote, "Unfortunately, school officials are too stupid, lazy, and apathetic to do anything about the nonstop sadistic bullying of students …," you were being too kind to the officials. You omitted malicious.

You thereby accused the officials only of negligence. You overlooked the possibility that many officials deliberately promote student sadism. Of course, the officials don't do this overtly; they resort to the favorite behavior of their fellow government bureaucrats: passive-aggressive hostility.

Anyone who attended public school recognized and remembered it. Children can instantly recognize passive-aggressive hostility whenever they see it in adults. Dogs can smell it, which is the real reason that school principals do not allow students to bring their dogs to school.

to this day (I am 64), I can remember the name and face of every passive-aggressive school official I ever met or saw. - J.R.

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Question: "Ringer, you idiot, aren't you forgetting about the primary purpose of schools? Isn't it about giving kids a good education?" Glad you asked. Because giving all students access to the best education possible is extremely important to me. And I have a strong opinion about the right way to achieve that end for the greatest number of children, to wit:

Show me a child who is secure, who doesn't feel threatened or intimidated, who doesn't have to think about how to negotiate his way past teacher and student bullies, who feels good about himself, who is genuinely happy, and I'll show you a child who is eager to learn. And if a child is eager to learn, he will learn.

In other words, if learning is as important as most people believe it to be, then a school's number-one priority should be to prepare the playing field - to make conditions ideal for as many children as possible. If the primary objective is for kids to learn, provide them with a safe and secure learning environment. Doesn't that make perfectly good sense?

Later in this series, I'll get to plenty of other factors that I believe stand in the way of learning. But the starting point of a good and well-rounded education is a secure and happy child. From my perspective as a parent of six children, not to mention my own school experiences and those of hundreds of other parents with whom I have communicated, this is pretty much a non-negotiable starting point.

I can hear some people thinking, "My gosh, man! Don't you realize that U.S. students are lagging far behind the rest of the civilized world in virtually all areas of testing?" And here's my bubble-bursting response to that question: "I don't give a hoot what kind of test scores the Koreans and Dutch get!"

Heck, Joran Van Der Sloot graduated through the Dutch system, and he doesn't appear to me to be any great asset to society. I think he might have fared much better in life (and perhaps Natalie Holloway would still be alive) had Aruban teachers taught him a bit of kindness and compassion. Perhaps it's just a coincidence that he is remembered as a bully by many of his former classmates. But … I leave it to you to draw your own conclusions.

If you're now questioning why you signed up for this journey in the first place, and are wondering if it could possibly get any more "extreme," the answer is yes. There's a vast desert just ahead, and I see no oasis in sight. And, by the way … the caravan will be leaving on time.

Previous - Part X, Changing the Focus: How to Stop Bullying

Next - Part XII, Time Out for Clarification: One Step at a Time

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